he says it better than I can.

"As I write this, Republicans and Democrats are trying to work out a compromise on the rights of immigrants. But in none of these proposals is there a recognition that immigrants deserve the same rights as everyone else. Forgetting, or rather, ignoring the indignation of liberty-loving people at the building of the Berlin Wall, and the exultation that greeted its fall, there will be a wall built at the southern borders of California and Arizona. I doubt that any national political figure will point out that this wall is intended to keep Mexicans out of the land that was violently taken from Mexico in the War of 1846-1848.

Only the demonstrators in cities across the country are reminding us of the words on the Statue of Liberty in New York harbor: “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed, to me. I lift my lamp beside the golden door.” In the wave of anger against government action in the Sixties, cartoons were drawn showing the Statue of Liberty blindfolded. The blindfolds remain, if only symbolically, until we begin to act, yes, as if “No Human Being Is Illegal.”

by: Howard Zinn, Seven Stories Press | Book Excerpt 

the life of a crazy woman.

Today I officially decided not to be a crazy woman. this post will be unfiltered. Sorry I have not written in the past couple...centuries. At least, that's what it feels like.
Where to start?
1) I have been filling up my planner to the point of exhaustion.
2) Everyone knew this except for me.
3) I am stubborn and don't listen well, which everyone knows-again-except for me.
So to say that it caught me by complete surprise that I was on the verge of a burnout would not be the complete truth. The complete truth is that I am stubborn, that I knew, but I chose to ignore it because I am incredibly indispensable and so important that Birchcroft and the world would, naturally, completely self-destruct if I was not there to save it. And this is how I became a crazy woman.

Now, it took:
1) mold problems and carpet flooding
2) being displaced from our apartment
3)  being so exhausted that I could lay in bed at 7pm and still have no desire to get up at 1pm the next day
4) feeling an impending flu coming on
5) help from my husband and other friends
6) God Himself (last but most certainly not least)

to realize I needed to make some drastic changes in my life if I was going to have any hopes of being a mildly sane human being.

Here are my new un-crazywoman resolutions:
1) your First Love, remember Him?
2) Stop. Rest. Enjoy. Release.
3) Remove "yes. yes. yes." from my vocabulary.
4) Replace it with, "no." "Let me think about it." "maybe." "Let me ask Adam." 
5) When someone, in regards to Birchcroft, says, "You know, you guys should really..." or "hey, I was thinking it would be great for you to start a..." or "i have a dream for Birchcroft that you guys should think about..." I will say, "wow, that idea of yours is really awesome. OWN IT. DO IT. put your ideas and passions to use."
6) repeat whenever necessary.

I now feel this itchy, antsy, restless feeling when I am being intentional about just sitting. or resting. or not filling up my schedule. I think I am going through a withdrawal of sorts. Busyness withdrawal. God-complex withdrawal.
I used to think I was good at simplicity. All you who know me are probably laughing right now. But as my pastor says, "When you're deceived, you don't know you're deceived." Outward simplicity is very different from inward simplicity. I have no need for a mansion, but my soul is a skyscraper of expectations. Expectations of myself- to keep building and working in the name of Someone who asks me to do the exact opposite. He asks me to start slow. I feel Him saying: There is no rush. There were many before you and there will be many after you. You are not saving anyone, I am. I am still saving you. Rejoice in that. It starts with a tiny seed, not a massive tree. Plant it with faith. I will cultivate it, guard it and nurture it.

He makes me lie down in green pastures,
He leads me beside quiet waters,
He refreshes my soul.